Biggest Mistakes People Make During the Divorce Process

Divorce is rarely easy, and in the midst of all of the emotions and stress, it is easy to make mistakes that can end up costing you time and money. Whether it is rushing into decisions without fully thinking them through, ignoring important financial details, or letting emotions take over, many people find themselves wishing they had handled things differently during the divorce. Understanding common pitfalls during the divorce process can help you avoid them and navigate your case more effectively. 

Here are the biggest mistakes people make during divorce and tips for avoiding them.

Not Controlling Your Emotions

Divorce, especially high-conflict divorce, often brings a whirlwind of emotions, including anger, sadness, and fear, that can cloud judgment and lead to impulsive or retaliatory decisions. You might dig in your heels out of spite, surrender too much out of guilt, or push for a costly trial just to get a “win” over your ex. However, treating divorce as a battlefield rarely ends well. It can end up costing you more money and peace of mind than if you had controlled your emotions. A Massachusetts divorce attorney can help you navigate the emotional ups and downs while protecting your legal rights during the divorce process.

Not Putting Your Children First

Divorce is difficult enough, but when kids are involved, it gets trickier. A common mistake is not putting your children first. Using them as messengers, confiding in them like adults, or making them choose sides can cause emotional harm. Children need stability, love, and reassurance, not to be caught in the middle. Prioritize their well-being by shielding them from conflict, keeping communication age-appropriate, and focusing on their needs throughout the process.

Not Understanding Tax and Financial Implications Of Divorce

Divorce settlements can carry significant tax consequences that many people overlook. Elements such as spousal support, retirement account withdrawals, property transfers, and changes to your filing status can all impact your overall tax liability. Failing to account for these issues can result in unexpected tax bills or financial strain down the road. To avoid costly mistakes, work with an attorney who can help you understand how each aspect of your settlement will affect your taxes.

Additionally, failing to consider your long-term financial well-being can be harmful. Take the time to create a realistic post-divorce budget that factors in not only your current needs but also future expenses like retirement, education, and healthcare. Understand what is realistic for you on a single income. For instance, while keeping the house might feel like a victory, if the mortgage and maintenance costs exceed what you can manage on a single income, it could quickly turn into a financial burden. 

Not Putting Agreements In Writing

Making oral side agreements with your ex during a divorce is a serious mistake. While these informal deals might seem convenient or cooperative at the moment, they are not legally enforceable and can easily fall apart. Without putting agreements in writing and having them approved by the court, there is no legal protection if your ex changes their mind. Relying on verbal promises can lead to future disputes, confusion, and stress. Always formalize any agreement through your attorney and ensure they are approved by the court to protect your rights and avoid misunderstandings.

Rushing the Divorce Process

Understandably, those going through a divorce just want it to be over. But this desire to rush can lead to decisions you may later regret. Sometimes, parties will accept a proposed settlement simply to just get the divorce over and done with. Accepting a settlement just to finish the process can have devastating results. In an effort to move on quickly, you might agree to terms that do not fully protect your rights or meet your financial needs. Instead of speeding through the process, take the time to carefully review and understand every aspect of the proposed settlement.

Not Compromising On Anything 

We get it: if you are in the midst of a divorce, cooperation can be the last thing on your mind. But refusing to compromise during divorce can lead to prolonged, expensive, and emotionally draining litigation. There are some battles that you might be unwilling to compromise on. Having a willingness to negotiate on less critical matters can lead to faster settlements and better outcomes for everyone involved.

Not Hiring An Experienced Divorce Attorney

Divorce involves complex issues like dividing financial assets and determining the future of children. During the divorce process, it is crucial to seek legal advice solely from an attorney dedicated to your case. Friends or family members who have gone through a divorce might share their personal experiences and offer advice based on what they went through. However, it is important to remember that they are not legal professionals and may not fully understand the complexities of divorce law or how it applies to specific situations. Only qualified and experienced attorneys have the knowledge and expertise to provide accurate, reliable guidance tailored to the specific circumstances involved. 

Not Being Fully Honest With Your Attorney

It can feel hard to trust when going through a divorce. However, one major mistake to avoid during divorce is not being completely honest with your attorney. Your lawyer can only protect and advocate for you effectively if they have all the facts. Hiding information about finances, past behavior, or key events (before, during, or after separation) can backfire and weaken your case if the truth comes out later. Full transparency allows your attorney to build the strongest possible strategy and avoid surprises that could harm your position. This is why picking an attorney you can trust is so important.

Contact a Massachusetts Divorce Attorney 

The divorce process is overwhelming, and few are at their best going through it. An experienced Massachusetts divorce attorney can identify potential pitfalls before they happen and guide the process smoothly, protecting both your interests and your peace of mind. With compassionate and knowledgeable legal counsel, the divorce process becomes much more manageable. Do not hesitate to get the help needed to move forward confidently and protect what matters most.