What to Expect at Every Stage of Divorce in Massachusetts

Starting the Divorce Process

For many people, the divorce process begins with uncertainty. If this is your first time, you may not know what to expect, and that can feel overwhelming. The very first step is filing paperwork at the courthouse. Once filed, the paperwork is docketed, which means it is officially stamped, given a case number, and assigned to a judge.

After this, the court issues a summons. The summons is the official notice to your spouse that the divorce case has started. The timing of this stage can vary widely. In some courthouses, it might take only two weeks to receive the summons back. In others, it may take several months before the paperwork is processed.

Should You Rely on Friends or Social Media for Guidance?

One of the most common mistakes people make during divorce is turning to friends, family, or social media for legal advice. Even if someone you know went through divorce, their situation is not yours. Two cases with nearly identical facts can lead to very different outcomes, depending on factors like the judge assigned, the court’s schedule, or the day of the hearing.

The reality is that secondhand stories often leave out critical details. Sometimes, people don’t share the full truth. Other times, they simply misunderstand what happened in their case. That’s why relying on Facebook threads or casual advice can be more harmful than helpful.

Understanding the Plaintiff and Defendant Roles

Once the summons is issued, one spouse is labeled the plaintiff, and the other is labeled the defendant. Many people worry when they are served divorce papers because they don’t like the idea of being the “defendant.”

But in the Massachusetts family court, being the defendant does not mean you did anything wrong. It is not like a criminal court, where a defendant is accused of breaking the law. In divorce, “defendant” only means you were not the one who filed first.

In some ways, this position can even be an advantage. As the defendant, you get to see what your spouse is requesting before you file your own response. That can give you a better sense of how to shape your strategy moving forward.

The 20-Day Deadline to Respond

Massachusetts law gives the defendant 20 days to file an answer. This deadline is important. The answer tells the court whether you agree or disagree with what your spouse outlined in their complaint for divorce.

Along with the answer, you can also file a counterclaim. A counterclaim is your opportunity to tell the court what you want to happen in the divorce. For example, you may have different requests about custody, parenting schedules, or financial arrangements. Filing a counterclaim ensures your side of the story is part of the official record.

Temporary Orders and Why They Matter

Because divorces take time, temporary orders are often necessary. A motion for temporary orders asks the judge to make short-term decisions about important issues, such as:

• Custody of the children

• Parenting schedules

• Who will stay in the home

• Who is responsible for paying certain bills

These orders are not permanent, but they create stability while the case is pending. Without them, families could be left in limbo for months at a time.

Clearing Up Confusion About Pretrial

Another stage of the process is pretrial, and it is one that is often misunderstood. Many people come to pretrial expecting to present every piece of evidence they have — emails, text messages, documents — believing the judge will review it all.

That is not how it works. Judges typically do not look at evidence until the actual trial. Pretrial has nothing to do with trial in that sense. Instead, it is your chance to tell the judge which issues are still unresolved. Both sides outline their disagreements, and the judge listens.

Why Pretrial Often Leads to Settlement

Pretrial is a powerful moment in the divorce process because of the feedback judges provide. Once both parties present their positions, the judge often shares thoughts about how they view the issues. Hearing that perspective can change the way you approach your case.

If the judge’s comments are far from what one spouse hoped for, it can push them toward settlement. In fact, around 80% of cases settle at or shortly after pretrial. The judge’s input often motivates both parties to compromise rather than risk trial.

What If You Go to Trial?

Of course, not every case settles. If your divorce proceeds to trial, you should be prepared for a much longer process. Trial involves detailed preparation, discovery, and careful review of every document and piece of evidence.

Many people expect trial to happen quickly, but the reality is different. Divorce trials in Massachusetts often take months or even years to conclude. Understanding this from the start helps you avoid unrealistic expectations.

Divorce Timelines: Fast or Slow

Not every divorce drags on. In some cases, if both spouses cooperate, resolution can come quickly. For example, a case that began with an emergency motion ended with a divorce judgment approved in just one week because the spouses worked together to resolve every issue.

On the other hand, if there is conflict at every step, the process can stretch out for a long time. Divorce timelines depend on the courthouse, the judge, and most importantly, the willingness of both spouses to find common ground.

Final Thoughts

The Massachusetts divorce process moves through distinct stages — filing, summons, answer, temporary orders, pretrial, settlement opportunities, and sometimes trial. Each stage serves a specific purpose, even if the path feels unpredictable.

If you are beginning this journey, the best way to protect yourself is to rely on professional legal guidance rather than stories or social media advice.