What To Expect When You Go To Court

“What’s going to happen when we go to court?” The answer to that varies based on why you’re going to court and where you’re going to court. Are you going to court because it’s a motion for temporary orders? Are you going on a contempt? Are you going on a pretrial? Are you going on a trial? They are different processes and when you go, the procedure for how it all comes about is going to be slightly different. It also varies based on where you are actually going to court, as every courthouse is different and every judge is different.

The fact of the matter is, I can not really tell you what is going to happen physically. I just can not make those types of assumptions or predictions, but what I can tell you will happen is it will be emotionally and mentally draining. Going to court is not fun, it’s not the typical over dramatized tv proceedings. I don’t know your profession, but I know my son in law is enlisted and he hates to watch military movies because he feels they are more often than not romanticized, exaggerated, and just plain wrong on a lot of things; and I feel the same way about any legal drama or show. What you see on tv or in the movies is not what you should be expecting. But I can tell you from experience, that it is dramatic in its own way. Anytime I have had to go to court regarding my own family, I still get anxious, nervous and run through every possible scenario in my head of what might happen, how it will affect my children (even though my oldest is twenty-one years old), if will be back in court again over the same issue in a few months or what the next issue might be. I’ve been divorced for about a decade and a half now, and I still find myself going to court over things with my ex.

Anytime you go to court, no matter how sure you are of what will happen or how many times you’ve gone down the same road, it is exhausting. It is mentally and emotionally, and even physically exhausting. I will tell you to be prepared for a roller coaster of emotions, no matter what or why you are there because that is exactly what it is. You feel anger, sadness, worry, relief, grief, stressed, anxious, frustrated, confused and if you are lucky you feel blessed. Blessed to move on, blessed to get the outcome you wanted, blessed to know your children are safe, happy, or whatever it might be. But it is a roller coaster, and my best advice is to prepare yourself for the ride you are about to take, for the next chapter you are writing, and learn some breathing exercises so you are able to hold your tongue in court (I can promise this will come in handy!).

Basically, I can leave you with the age old saying, “expect the worst, hope for the best and prepare for the unexpected” -unknown.